Thursday, February 15, 2024

Part Nine


Part Nine


Shard was exhausted by the time she went to sleep that night. She woke up the next day stiff and sore, but Nathalia didn't care. Just as soon as Shard complained about it, Nathalia was quick to comment on how the soreness was good, needed, and should be expected every day going forward. A comment Shard was not happy to hear. Nathalia made Shard start off the morning with another run through the woods. Shard did not encounter the wolf this time, but she stuck to the path just in case. As she did the day before, Nathalia guided Shard through a series of strength training exercises. These focused on new muscle groups. While Shard didn’t have to exert the sore muscles as much, new muscles hurt afterward. Nathalia practically confirmed that Shard’s life from here would be in a perpetual state of cycling pain. The woman was always ready with a sharp word and handy switch if Shard ever got complacent. After breakfast, the two went outside to practice harnessing Shard’s ice magic abilities. Shard created various icy objects until she became tired or could no longer take the cold. Usually, it was a combination of the two. After lunch, Nathalia added to Shard’s growing list of chores. Shard went to bed completely spent and slept soundly until Nathalia woke her up the next day for more of the same. 


Days turned into weeks. Weeks turned into months. While Shard found much to complain about, she was still taken care of. She ate well. She slept well. She grew in strength and competency, though she would never admit it. Shard never saw the wolf as long as she was with Nathalia. She would ask Nathalia about the world, about magic, and about Nathalia’s past. Nathalia always seemed annoyed when the question wasn’t directly relevant to training. Any information about Thorae was drenched in hatred and warnings of self preservation. Eventually, Shard stopped asking. Two months into training, Nathalia introduced weapons. Shard trained with a bow for hunting and a sword for self defense. Neither tool was particularly good quality. In the sword’s case, it wasn’t even sharp. The purpose of it was to practice swinging a long piece of metal, so Nathalia instructed. The arrows were flimsy, inaccurate, and broke often, but Nathalia assured her pupil that practicing correct form and stance was more important anyway. The list of chores grew. Wash the dishes, clean the house, split logs for fire, prepare breakfast, prepare lunch, prepare dinner, dispose of the garbage, wash the clothes. Shard started to wonder if there was anything Nathalia did on her own any more. Eventually, Nathalia brought Shard along on her hunting trips. They went along the path behind the garden and took the left route. They climbed over logs and boulders and over streams. Nathalia had a preferred area she went to. Nathalia showed the girl where she hid her traps and how to check them. If the trapped animals were still alive, Nathalia finished them off and showed Shard how to field dress them. Shard got sick the first time watching, much to Nathalia’s disappointment. 


The only reprieve Shard had from her training was when Nathalia took trips to town to restock their supplies. Shard was not allowed to go with her. Shard begged to go along at first, but after the third time she was denied, she stopped asking. Shard got to the point she preferred to be left alone. It was the only truly free time she had to herself and she found herself spending most of it outside. Shard would walk through the woods, although never far from the house. In the garden, she practiced making snow and ice sculptures. Not the walls and icicles that Nathalia demanded of her. Shard made snow bunnies, snow ducklings, little ice castles, and snowmen. She made snow owls and ice flowers and even a little village with snow people. She made these all in the garden where Nathalia couldn’t destroy them by accident. It became her favorite way to use her ice abilities. It was one of the few things completely in Shard’s control and, as far as she knew, the only part of her existence Nathalia knew nothing about. If Nathalia ever asked, Shard simply said she practiced her ice magic. As the months passed and the world grew warmer, Shard was sad to see her creations melt between visits. She would recreate them, but it wasn’t long before the snow and ice were replaced with grass and leaves as spring took over. Shard’s time in the garden was replaced with tending to the dirt and weeds. It seemed Nathalia was set on having a productive garden by the time late spring and summer came around. 


One day, while Shard was inspecting the tiny plants she and Nathalia cared for, Shard noticed the leaves were damaged. Something was sneaking into the garden and eating the frail plants. Shard mentioned it to Nathalia only once and the woman permitted her to spend more time in the garden. A few days passed before Shard caught the culprit. She was inspecting a row of greens when a rustle caught her attention. Looking up, Shard spotted a small, black creature. She thought it was a rabbit due to its long, pointed ears, but it had a tail like that of a squirrel. Acting quickly, Shard created a cage of ice around the creature to trap it. “So you’re the one eating our plants,” Shard said with a smile as she drew closer to investigate. The creature in the cage was a small thing. It didn’t panic or try to run. It sat in the cage nibbling on the plant leaves closest to it. “Well, aren’t you adorable,” Shard sat in front of it and watched with a smile. “Are you a vicious monster like the ones Nathalia keeps telling me about?” She asked, not expecting an answer. “I bet you’re a killer rabbit,” Shard continued. “Enjoy your light salad before turning into a cold-blooded predator.” Shard giggled, still watching the creature. The black, shiny fur looked soft and fluffy. The creature’s brown eyes stared at her as it continued eating. The long ears stood upright like radars for a second before flopping back down. “If I bring you food you can eat, will you stop eating the plants I’m trying to grow?” Shard asked. She reached into her cloak and retrieved an apple. Shard bit off a large chunk and held it out to the creature. The tiny animal took the piece of apple and munched on it. “There. We can have peace after all,” Shard said. She took apart the bars of ice and watched the creature dart away. The creature was there the next day when Shard came to check on the plants. Again, Shard fed it a bit of apple. The creature seemed comfortable with Shard’s presence. Shard was happy to have a friend to talk to that wasn’t Nathalia. The fluffy black creature listened without judgment and never said a harsh word. Granted, it never spoke at all. Shard started calling it “Flopsy” due to the creature’s ears always flopping back into place when lowering from their radar mode. Shard never told Nathalia about the new friend, but she wondered if the woman would let her keep the creature as a pet. Shard spent a few days pondering how best to ask. She wondered what words to use and in what order she’d have to say them to sound the most convincing. 


*****************

“Don’t stop moving!” Nathalia barked one day as they were training. “If you stop moving for two seconds, you’re dead!” 

Shard barely dodged a sword swipe with a roll and pulled her blade up in time to block. Nathalia spun to the left and Shard had to parry to avoid injury. “Slow down!” Shard exclaimed. 

“No, you speed up!” Nathalia answered with another swing. “You have to be faster than this! Strike first. Strike hard. Strike without hesitation!” 

Nathalia batted away the sword and managed to pin Shard. “Again.” She let Shard up and resumed speaking while training. “The best defense is a good offense. Attack before the enemy has a chance to even draw their blade.”

“That doesn’t sound fair,” Shard said through gritted teeth as she dodged another attack. 

“Life isn’t fair,” Nathalia said. “Stop dodging and attack. You don’t have the capacity to outlast your enemy. The time you waste hoping to weaken your opponent is time used against you. Kill them before they kill you.” She pinned Shard again. “Because they will kill you.” 

Shard glared at the woman. “What about mercy?” 

“Your enemy will never be merciful.” Nathalia helped Shard up. “So neither should you extend mercy. You must finish the kill. Every time. If your enemy escapes, they will come back stronger and they will retaliate without warning.” Nathalia stretched her open hand out. 

Shard handed her the hilt of her own sword as they headed for the house. “I’ll take care of lunch today, if you want to go check on the garden,” Nathalia said. 

“Oh, that’s nice of you,” Shard said. “Thanks.” She went around to the back of the house and looked for the little black creature. Flopsy had met her in the garden every day for a couple weeks straight now and Shard was just getting up the courage to talk to Nathalia about keeping it. Strangely enough, Shard could not find the little creature today. She looked around the garden and even into the woods, but came up empty-handed. She set a whole apple down in the creature’s usual spot and went inside the house. 


Part Eight


Part Eight


Shard got up and followed the woman back inside the house. When Shard entered, Nathalia had pushed the couch out of the way, leaving an open area in the center of the room. 

“How many push ups can you do?” Nathalia asked. 

“What?” Shard looked at her with confusion. “I don’t know... None?” 

Nathalia pointed to the floor. “Start with ten.”
Shard frowned. “You can’t be serious.” Nathalia flicked the switch against the wall, the noisy crack scaring Shard. “Okay! Okay!” Shard threw off the cloak and attempted to do a push-up, only to collapse. “I can’t-”

Nathalia flicked the switch. “Again.”

Shard attempted again while Nathalia spoke. “Keep your back straight. Don’t lock your elbows. Don’t stop breathing. Again. Use your muscles. Engage your core. Again!” 

Shard gave out and stared at the wooden floor as she huffed. “I can’t!” 

Nathalia sat on the floor beside her and smacked the wood with the switch. “Again. Control your breathing. You sound like a dying pig.” 

“...I… huff… can’t… huff…” Shard crossed her arms and rested her forehead on them. 

“Say ‘can’t’ one more time,” Nathalia threatened as she leaned over. “You can and you will. Or do you want to roll over and let life trample all over you? You want to be a little lamb led to the slaughter? Answer me!”

“No,” Shard answered. “But I need rest.”

“Rest is for the weak.” Nathalia straightened. “Are you weak?” 

Shard wanted to answer yes out of spite, if not out of honesty. “No,” she huffed. 

“Prove it.” Nathalia’s switch landed on Shard’s shoulder. “Again.”

Shard bit back the tears and continued as instructed. Attempted to, anyway. She couldn't keep form and she didn’t keep count. After a moment, Nathalia stood up. “Good. Now lunges.” 

“Wha-” 

Nathalia swatted the switch at Shard. “Get up and take a step forward. No, that’s too close. No, now it’s too far. Good. Now back. Other side. Again.” Nathalia guided Shard through a few more exercises. Always commanding. Always ready with the switch should Shard be less than cooperative. 

“Good, good,” Nathalia said after a while. “Well, not really good. You actually did terrible with all of them, but it’s a start. Everyone has to start somewhere.” 

Shard lay on the floor, sweating and breathing heavily. “... huff... why…?” She glared at Nathalia, angry, but too tired to do anything about it. Nathalia sat on the floor beside Shard with her legs crossed. 

“Strength,” Nathalia replied. “Discipline. Flexibility. Speed. Balance. Control. How do you expect to swing a weapon around with flimsy arms like yours? A sword is only as strong as the hand that holds it.” 

Shard blinked at Nathalia. “A sword? I get a sword?” 


Nathalia shrugged. “If you want. Sword. Bow. Spear. Axe. All tools. The best tools you have are your mind and body.” Shard sat up to listen, breathing still calming down. Nathalia continued. “A body you have full control over will protect you better than the best weapon money can buy. A sharp mind will cut deeper than the sharpest blade. If you want to survive in this world, you need to start using your head.” 

Shard frowned. “I’m not an idiot.”

“That’s yet to be determined.” Nathalia scoffed. “In the end, it’s not the weapon or your skill with it that will give you the strength needed to survive. It’s in here.” Nathalia pointed to her heart. “If you despair, if you give in, if you show any hesitation at all, you might as well roll over and accept your fate. You’re a fighter. That’s good, but you have to keep fighting. Over and over again. The day you stop fighting is the day you die. Fight until your last breath.” 

Shard’s glare softened. Where once was anger, she now felt sorrow. “It can’t be that way all the time,” she said softly. “I mean, we can relax while we’re safe, right? We’re safe here. Nothing’s going to get us in here.” 

Nathalia frowned. “Cattle in a pen think they’re safe. Safety is a false concept. Even here. You can be attacked at any moment, by anyone.” 

“What about other people? There’s safety in numbers, right? What about friends?” Shard asked. 

“Friends will stab you in the back,” Nathalia answered without emotion. “Friends won’t help you. If you are in need, do you think friends will help you? If you’re starving, do you think friends will share their food? If you’re without a home, you think they’ll invite you into theirs?” She shook her head. “They won’t. The only person you can rely on is yourself. Remember it.”

“What… what about you?” Shard asked softly. 

“I can’t protect you forever.” Nathalia smiled and stood up. She started pushing the couch back into place. “Come. It’s time to make breakfast. I’m hungry enough to eat you.” 

“WHAT?!” Shard turned to Nathalia in alarm. 

Nathalia laughed. “I’m only teasing. Try not to take things so seriously.”

Shard relaxed and let out a nervous laugh. Shard watched Nathalia start making food as her smile faded. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for whatever happened to you to turn you into such a person. I’m sorry for whoever hurt you. 


***********************************


Nathalia made breakfast and Shard cleaned up the dishes. After the dishes, Nathalia had Shard clean the room and floor. While Shard started off not doing any chores, her list of things to do around the house seemed to gradually be growing. Shard didn’t mind as much. She felt it was fair to help out after everything Nathalia had done for her. After breakfast, Nathalia directed Shard outside again. 

“Now,” Nathalia started. “Focus on the cold.” 

Shard blinked at her. “It’s freezing out here. I’m not sure how I can focus on it any more than that.” 

“No,” Nathalia said. “Focus on your connection to it. The element is an extension of yourself. Become the frost.” 

Shard raised an eyebrow then rolled her eyes. “Become the frost. That sounds ridiculous.” 

Nathalia stooped down to pick up some snow and packed it into a ball. She threw the snowball in Shard’s direction. The snowball missed, but it got Shard’s attention. 

“Hey!” Shard shouted then bent down to collect some snow. 

“No,” Nathalia warned. “Create your own snowball.” 

Shard stopped and looked at her hands. She could feel the cold starting to numb the tips of her fingers. She could feel the hairs on her arms rise as a breeze ruffled the edge of her cloak. Shard shivered and clenched her fists


“You’re still trying to keep yourself warm,” Nathalia stated, folding her arms. “Warmth and cold cannot exist in the same space. The harder you fight to keep yourself warm, the weaker your frost control will be. Accept the cold. Embrace it.” 

Shard frowned. “And what happens when I freeze to death?” 

“You won’t,” Nathalia reassured. “You’ll be the strongest you’ve ever been.” 

“You make no sense,” Shard muttered. 

“It’s Thoraen elemental magic,” Nathalia countered. “Of course it doesn’t make sense to an ignorant earthling. Let your core grow cold.” 


Shard took a deep breath and focused with her eyes closed. As she let out a long breath, she relaxed every part of her that wanted to contract and preserve heat. She forced the warm air out of her lungs and breathed in the cold. 

“Good,” Nathalia said. “Focus on what you want to accomplish. Picture it clearly.” 

Shard put her palms together and let out another breath of hot air. She kept her body relaxed and slowed her breathing. Shard focused on the space between her palms. She could feel an icy shape forming between her hands. After a moment, Shard looked down and opened her hands. A small rosebud of ice delicately sat in her cupped hands. A huge smile grew on Shard’s face as she stared at it. “I did it! It turned out just like I wanted it to!” She held up the clear, icy flower. “It’s beautiful! Nathalia, look at what I made!” 

Shard kept forgetting the woman’s eyes were covered at all times. She looked up to see Nathalia frowning at her. “I told you to make a snowball,” Nathalia said, arms still folded.

“Oh… right...” Shard gently set the rosebud down in the snow and focused again. What she ended up with was a solid ball of ice, not a snowball. “Well… it’s close, but I wouldn’t want to throw this at you.” 

“Try again,” Nathalia said. 

Shard focused again, but came up with the same result. She set the globes of ice down next to the rosebud. The third time she tried, the ball was frozen on the outside, but slush on the inside. She only knew this because it quickly cracked and spilled all over her hands. Shard shook her hands off and clenched them a few times. “I can’t feel my fingers…” 

Nathalia frowned. “That’s to be expected. Your body will adjust and acclimate with practice. Eventually, you won’t feel it at all.” 

“My hands or the cold?” Shard asked skeptically. 

Nathalia shrugged as she stepped close, heading toward the house. “Maybe either, but what do I know?” She brushed past Shard, footsteps crunching as she walked back inside. 

Shard looked down. The globes were still intact, but the rosebud was crushed. Nathalia must have stepped on it by accident, Shard told herself. I can always make another one later